Wednesday, 3 September 2014

Paperchase Vs. WHSmith

It is official! I have spread my pastel pink, glittery wings and moved to Bristol.

I wish I could say it was for university or because 'I really feel like that's where I'm, like, going to, like, find myself....like' but I basically just followed my parents as that is what 16 year olds with no source of income or real life direction generally do. I would never have the guts to live somewhere where my mum wasn't readily on hand to buy me Quorn ham and to dish out steaming plates of criticism in the form of 'motherly advice'. I like to think of it as tough love (someone please adopt me).

I got lost in the middle of Bristol today and the bus driver confused me and I shouted at my mum and she swore at me and I cried and she cried and the bus driver cried and the whole city of Bristol cried*.

*If anyone has any knowledge of Bristol, please help me.

So, Bristol. I have officially lived here for 4 days now and still get confused as to what road I live on. It seems to be a common thing in Bristol for roads to be called the same name even though they're all very close to each other. It's frustrating and confusing, especially when I'm trying to get a bus and there are three bus stops on, according to their names, the same road. Also, the online timetable says my bus comes every twenty minutes but the timetable at the bus stop says it comes every hour and a half. So I had just started walking back to my flat (because who waits 53 minutes for a bus?) and, of course the bus comes sailing round the corner, singing a happy tune, as I desperately run to the bus stop and then proceed to mutter expletives at the bus timetable as I wait for the next bus*.

*I refused to leave the stop, just in case another off-the-charter bus wanted to make a surprise appearance.

I feel like I'm not portraying Bristol, or at least its public transport network, in the best light. I will list some cool things about it.

1. The shops. Maybe I lived in Nottingham for so long I was immune to its many commercial perks but I swear there are like three times as many shops here. If this was a fashion blog, maybeeee I'd do a post about what I got bought today but it's not and you guys don't want to read that.

2. The grass! Everywhere I look there is grass (as in the green stuff that grows in the ground not the widely-used illegal drug). Literally, the parks make me want to do exercise and be cute + independent and have a picnic-for-one whilst reading a Vogue magazine and instagram-ing the whole thing.

3. The cute little boutiques and individual shops. I saw a hair salon for kids today with little mini planes as seats and it was SO CUTE. Cute, cute, cute, cute, cute*.

*I use this word a lot. Get used to it. Love it. 

I have ran out of things but I think that is a pretty impressive list after only four days of living here. There's also stuff I dislike such as: the accent (hopefully I'll get used to it), the water (it tastes like bicarbonate of soda), the confusing road name thing (sort it out Bristol council people) and lastly, but not least, the lack of stationery shops. In Nottingham, you literally step out of your door and there is a new Paperchase doing a lap dance on your car whilst WHSmith heckles. Honestly, Nottingham loves its stationery.

So hopefully this has given you a teeny idea of what Bristol (and its grass) is like and how little I know about its ridiculous bus system.

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